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    LEMU Dawa’h: Finding peace in a polygamous relationship

    By Haroon-Ishola Balogun

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    In the secluded confines of the Jubrila Ayinla Multipurpose Hall, Lekki Central Mosque complex, a profound gathering unfolded on Sunday, December 1, 2024.

    The Lekki Muslim Ummah’s Da’wah workshop, “Polygamy as Ordained by Allah,” brought together esteemed Islamic scholars and experts, igniting a passionate discourse on the intricacies of polygamy.

    As the veil of mystery lifted, Dr. Ridwan Jamiu, Chief Imam of Lekki Central Mosque, Sheikh Abu Labeebah, Director of Daaru Sa’aadah Islamic Centre, and Hajiya Maryam Nurudeen-Arole, a Polygyny Coach, delved into the heart of intimacy, faith, and relationships.

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    Intimacy, a divine bond

    Dr. Jamiu’s voice resonated deeply as he emphasized, “Intimacy is not merely physical; it’s a spiritual connection, a divine bond between husband and wives.” He stressed the significance of emotional intimacy, citing the Prophet’s (SAW) teachings: “The best of you are those who are best to their wives.” Dr. Jamiu urged husbands to prioritize emotional connection, fostering trust, compassion and understanding. Sheikh Abu Labeebah passionately elaborated, “Intimacy is an act of worship, a means to seek Allah’s pleasure.”

    He cautioned against emotional detachment, emphasizing empathy and compassion. “A husband’s sensitivity to his wives’ needs is crucial. Neglecting emotional intimacy can lead to a barren relationship, devoid of spiritual growth.” Hajiya Nurudeen-Arole shared poignant insights, drawing from her expertise as a Polygyny Coach. “Intimacy evolves over time; it requires effort, communication and vulnerability.”

    She stressed the importance of scheduling quality time, active listening and expressing gratitude. “In polygynous relationships, intimacy is not a competition, but a harmonious balance of love, respect and understanding.”

    Navigating challenges

    The speakers candidly addressed common challenges, offering guidance on maintaining intimacy amidst multiple relationships. Dr. Jamiu advised husbands to prioritize fairness, ensuring equal attention and quality time with each wife. Sheikh Abu Labeebah emphasized self-reflection, recognizing individual limitations and seeking forgiveness. Hajiya Nurudeen-Arole encouraged open communication, fostering a safe space for emotional expression.

    A covenant of love

    As the workshop concluded, the audience was left with a profound understanding: polygamy, when practiced with compassion, empathy and faith, becomes a covenant of love, transcending societal norms.

    Dr. Jamiu’s parting words echoed deeply: “Polygyny is not merely a marital arrangement; it’s a spiritual journey, woven with threads of love, trust and devotion.” Sheikh Abu Labeebah’s closing remarks resonated: “Intimacy in polygamy requires patience, understanding and sacrifice. As we strive for divine pleasure, we must prioritize the hearts and souls of our wives.”

    In this sacred space, intimate questions were asked by participants, boundaries dissolved, and hearts converged.

    The secrets of polygamous intimacy, and all the myth surrounding practice, equity and justice, now shone brightly, illuminating paths to deeper understanding and spiritual growth. LEMU Quarterly Dawah as greatly impacted in some Muslims. Thanks to the organisers.

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